Ok, I'll admit it, this is sort of cheating. This isn't actually a Rakim song, it's a Shaq song FEATURING Rakim, off of Shaq's third album. As such, it's not really exceptionally notable that Ra mentions Shaq in this song, since he's rhyming alongside him. Normally, I wouldn't count this.
But things are different for me and Rakim since I realized he was the greatest rapper of all time about a month ago. I was going through his entire discography when I realized that he had never released a bad album. Four records with Eric B. and three solo and the worst of them is probably Let the Rhythm Hit'Em, which still has, you know, the song "Let the Rhythm Hit'Em" on it. It's an unprecedented run when you look back on it. The Master released albums from 1987 to 2009. His debut was Paid in Full, which I contend is the best album of the Golden Age. His last album, The Seventh Seal, wasn't fantastic, but it was MILES ahead of the embarrassing late career albums of his Golden Age contemporaries like Biz Markie, Big Daddy Kane, Public Enemy, and the highly overrated KRS-One. Rakim is one of rap's great lyricist and the fact that his discography is without a blemish puts him ahead of other top 10 MCs like 2pac (his early albums weren't very good and his posthumous stuff is INCREDIBLY hit or miss), Biggie (a surprising amount of filler for someone who only released two albums proper), Nas (do I need to explain?), Jay-Z (ditto), and even dark-horse candidates like Eminem (don't make me bring up the Encore period), Ghostface Killah (I like his "R&B" album, but I'm the only one), and Ice Cube (he's releasing mediocre material AS WE SPEAK).
That's not what I was talking about... |
When I'm in flight, it make me and Shaq the same height.
Explanation: When Ra is "lifted" (either by the sublime experience of rapping or by smoking weed), it brings him a foot or so off the floor, making him and Shaq equal height.
Awkwardness of Line: I feel like I've said this a lot this week, but Rakim doesn't really spit that many awkward lines. One of the things that separates top 50 MCs from Ja Rule is their ability to gloss over their weaker lines with either their flow, voice, or superior craftsmanship. Rakim possesses all three of those traits in abundance, and he shows it on this song, which is genuinely pretty good even with Shaq on it. So, not awkward, I mean. 4 of 5.
Cleverness of Line: Rakim is extremely clever, but we're finding more and more that clever Shaq-related rhymes are few and far between. This one isn't NOT clever, it just isn't clever, if you know what I mean. Which, how could you? 3 of 5.
Appropriateness of Line: Rakim is about 5'9 and Shaq, as previously documented, is 7'1, meaning the power of Ra's lyrical prowess and/or marijuana would have to raise him a little over a foot off the ground. Rakim is the greatest rapper of all time, so I fully believe that this is possible. Also, weed is a hell of a...no, wait. For reference, the shortest rapper ever is Bushwick Bill, who comes in at around 3'8. 3 of 5.
Shaqness of Line: As I've said before, Shaq is nowhere near the tallest NBA player ever, so I usually dock points for references to his height. However, this is a song about Shaq, so it would make no sense for Ra to reference anyone else and, being as the song is on Shaq's album, I feel like "Shaqness" can't really get much higher, right? Also, I'm cheating so that Rakim will have a better score. 5 of 5.
Clear evidence that you have to have someone ELSE shoot you for it to make you into a millionaire. |
FINAL SHAQ SCORE: 15 OUT OF 20
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